NO MORE MYSPACE

I deleted my myspace account. I don't really do it anymore so I deleted it.

By the way, Happy New Year!

Maya Angelou's Quotations

An icy pool is not tempting to a long-distance swimmer. But after a few laps, the temperature becomes not only manageable, but delicious. This new change may not appear welcoming for you, but you may be surprised how easily you adjust.

We spend precious hours fearing the inevitable. It would be wise to use that time adoring our families, cherishing our friends, and living our lives.

God puts rainbows in the clouds so that each of us – in the dullest and most dreary moments – can see a possibility of hope.

When life surrounds me with problems, I remember no question can be asked if the answer is not already in the universe.

Your life is much more important than you can imagine. It is your first treasure.

While everything around you is changing, you are changing, too. Trust your new self to adapt in all things you do.

When the right world is offered at the right time, the vault of joy opens and angels dance on the head of a pin.

Whether you are happy or whether you are sad, it is wise to remember you are really in process.

I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.

Life loves the person who dares to live it.

We must take fear and by love, change it into hope.

*Grey's Anatomy Quotes* <2006, August 30, Wednesday - 02:10 PM>

Current mood: thoughtful Who’s to say what’s impossible Well they forgot this world keeps spinning And with each new day I can feel a change in everything   And as the surface breaks reflections fade But in some ways they remain the same And as my mind begins to spread its wings There’s no stopping curiosity   I want to turn the whole thing upside down I’ll find the things they say just can’t be found I’ll share this love I find with everyone Well sing and dance to Mother Nature’s songs I don’t want this feeling to go away   Who’s to say I can’t do everything Well I can try, and as I roll along I begin to find Things aren’t always just what they seem   I want to turn the whole thing upside down I’ll find the things they say just can be found I’ll share this love I find with everyone We’ll sing and dance to Mother Nature’s songs   This world keeps spinning And there’s no time to waste Well it all keeps spinning spinning Round and round and upside down   Who’s to say what’s impossible and can’t be found I don’t want this feeling to go away     We have to make our own mistakes We have to learn our own lessons We sweep today? Possibility under Tomorrow’s rug until We can’t anymore Until we finally understand for ourselves What Benjamin Franklin meant   That knowing is better than wondering That waking is better than sleeping And that even the biggest failure and Even the most intractable mistake beats the Hell out of never trying.     You can have anything in life if you are Willing to sacrifice everything else for it.   Nothing comes without a price.   So, before you go into battle, you better Decide how much you’re willing to lose   Too often, going after what feels good means Letting go of what you know is right   Letting someone in means abandoning the Walls you spent a lifetime building   The toughest sacrifices are the ones we don’t see coming.   When we don’t have time to come up With a strategy to pick a side, Or to measure the potential loss, When the battle chooses us Not the other way around, That’s when the sacrifice can turn out To be more than we can bare

Currently Listening Never Really Was By Mario Winans see related

*You may think...* <2006, August 23, Wednesday - 03:11 AM>

Current mood: cynical

You may think that you know someone so well because you confided in them and told them about certain things that has happened to you which you rather not talk about ever again. You felt safe with them. You were always comforted that although things have ended that person loved you so because of that love it is okay.

Then you learn that everything that they told you was a lie. They never cared about you because if they did, they would have never done that. But the water has been spilt and the deed has been done. It is a part of the past.

You know it wasn't your fault but you can't stop crying because now you are mourning for trusting them in the first place. What made you gamble with the most important thing? Was your heart worth it? Was it wise to have laid out so many cards on the table? How could anyone do that? If that wasn't it, then they shouldn't have said the words "I love you." So WHY??? Just a little bit of honesty, and my heart wouldn't be having such a hard time.

Even after all this time, it doesn't do anything. You think you are over someone then learn of the betrayl, and it is too much. It's like you have always fought and hurt for this relationship. Even when the relationship is dead, the remains haunt you - creeping under your skin and driving you to the road of insanity.

You gave your trust, told them many secrets, you don't want to go through it again... Why should you go through your nightmares again with another person? Why rekindle old war wounds? Is there a point? Do you really want to be that vulnerable again? Will the next person you fall in love with be someone like that other?

Do you have to trust again in order to love? Do you have to risk it all one more time? How many one more times can a person have to find "the one?" Does "the one" even exist? Can't you just say you're scared and please leave me alone...  Or is that being selfish and reckless just like that bastard who twisted with your mind and played with your heart?

So many questions but no answer. I learned that the best answers are those find within yourself. So here I go on my next chapter of my life...

*This song talks about betrayl. Kinda popped up in my head.

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Never Really Was - Mario Winnans

[Talking]
I just need to talk to you for a second,
It won't take me long,
I gotta get this off my chest,
Listen!

I'm really glad that you can take out time,
Cause I got a lot on my mind,
I never thought that you would be the kind,
To do the dirt and hang you head,
Babygirl won't you make me understand,
Why you would say the things you said to me,
You made me believe we would be forever
But it was all a lie

[Chorus]
If it never really was what you seen in me,
Why did you say you believed in me,
It's all because of you my security,
It's driving me crazy baby,
If it never really was what you had for me,
Why did you say that you wanted me, needed me,
If it never really was what you ment for me,
Tell me

Now I know I've asked you time and time again,
Were you sure you didn't want another man,
I would of understood it back then,
But you had to wait until I gave in,
Now I know I've been a sucker for your love,
Baby tell me what the hell was I thinking of,
I should of listened to them when they told me
But I learned the hard way

[Chorus]
If it never really was what you seen in me,
Why did you say you believed in me,
It's all because of you my security,
It's driving me crazy baby,
If it never really was what you had for me,
Why did you say that you wanted me, needed me,
If it never really was what you ment for me,
Tell me

Why would you play with my heart,
When I gave it all,
It's tearing me apart girl,
All you had to do is so say,
I would of let you go,
You're making it so hard girl

Why would you play with my heart,
When I gave it all,
It's tearing me apart girl,
All you had to do is so say,
I would of let you go,
You're making it so hard girl

Tell me why, why baby

[Chorus]
If it never really was what you seen in me,
Why did you say you believed in me,
It's all because of you my security,
It's driving me crazy baby,
If it never really was what you had for me,
Why did you say that you wanted me, needed me,
If it never really was what you ment for me,
Tell me

[Chorus]
If it never really was what you seen in me,
Why did you say you believed in me,
It's all because of you my security,
It's driving me crazy baby,
If it never really was what you had for me,
Why did you say that you wanted me, needed me,
If it never really was what you ment for me,
Tell me

[Chorus (Girl's part)]
If it never really was what you seen in me,
Why did you say you believed in me,
(I just tried to give you what you needed)
It's all because of you my security,
It's driving me crazy baby,
(Would you just tell me why you lied to me)
If it never really was what you had for me,
Why did you say that you wanted me, needed me,
(don't know)
If it never really was what you ment for me,
Tell me

*Going away...*

Today I woke up early to go see my baby go back to the USA. He's going back home to Minnesota. We spent alot of time together. It was really nice just being with him. I cried alot because it hurts alot to say goodbye to someone you really love & care about. I brought some Korean traditional rice cakes, brewed coffee, and slices of watermelon~ hehehe We sat down and ate it. We also talked and later on got some icecream. After that I left because Tyler went in the boarding area. Turns out it only took him about 10 minutes to finish everything so ended up just waiting. Oh, well. It would've been nice to spend more time with him, but I'm glad I got to see him one more time before he left. He called me after I left. It was nice hearing his voice. I think I'm getting sick because I have a fever right now and my nose is getting a little runny~ hehehe I miss you already... T.T